Fatherhood

Serendipitous, I’d say, that I stumbled across this blog post by Josh Brown today. It’s about fatherhood, and the exceptionally little amount of effort it takes to be a decent father (especially compared to what a mother does).

I say serendipitous because this morning I really felt like a lousy father. Once again I was upset with Tanner for disrupting my sleeping pattern. Instead of waking myself up an extra 30 minutes and goofing off with him, I sent him off. And angrily at that.

What I found most disheartening after reading Josh’s post is the realization that even with all my shortcomings, I’m still viewed as a pretty good father. Yet there are millions of the kids out there growing up without a father that even matches up to society’s lousy standard, which just blows my mind. Did you know that 94% of the people in prison are men, and 85% of those grew up in a home without a father? This whole discussion reminded me of a post I did a few years back called Why Do Dad’s Suck.

So today I felt a bit convicted and thought I’d make a few action items for myself…

• Appreciate my parents more, and let them know how much I appreciate them.

• Appreciate my wife more, and let her know how much I appreciate her.

• Spend more unselfish quality time with my son.

• Cherish the time.

• Listen to him more.

• Show more grace.

• Encourage other fathers to be more involved in their kids lives.

I want to continue to build on the solid legacy of parenting that my mother and father began. Don’t our kids deserve the best we have to offer?

Filed under: Dads, Fatherhood, Fathers, Parenting

Fathers Matter

Rick Reilly is best known for his back page column in Sports Illustrated. Recently he moved to ESPN where he will contribute to ESPN.com, SportsCenter, as well as a new column called “The Life of Reilly” in ESPN The Magazine. For his first column he chose to write a touching story about his father.

Read his story here.

Filed under: Dads, ESPN, Fatherhood, Fathers, Fathers Day, Rick Reilly, Sports Illustrated

Reflections of Fatherhood

So my dad hit a big milestone today—the big five-o. It’s weird to think that when we moved to Michigan in 1990 he was only a year older than I am now. That, sir, is the definition of time flying. It makes me wonder where I am in relation to where he was. I have a lot to live up to, that’s for sure. I know he doesn’t expect me to be him, or fill his rather large shoes, but the mold he left for me is one I intend to use.

It’s hard to say how proud I am to have the father I have (my mother too, but her 50th is just around the corner so she’ll get hers). The older I get, the more his legacy gets embedded into my heart. The story of his life would make the best sellers list easy. Married with a child at 17 and willing to do whatever it takes to make it work. He graduated college in 2 years with a 4.0, all the while dealing with a wife and 3 kids. Oh, and he came out debt free. Amazing doesn’t come close to describing him. A few years ago my dad was nervous just changing a light switch, but I needed someone to wire my house on the cheap, so he borrowed a few books from the library and wired my entire house, boxes and all. He passed with flying colors on the very first inspection. I could go on for days with stories just like these.

The old saying is true that you can never fully know a parents love until you have a child of your own. Ever since the birth of my son I’ve redefined my definition of love. And the more I realize the depth of that love, the more I realize that I’ve got the same thing coming right back at me.

I only hope I can be half the example for Tanner that my dad was for me. Happy Birthday dad. I love you!! May you be Forever Young.

Filed under: Dads, Fatherhood, Fathers, Legacy, Love